Any kind of pain that starts with the word “lightning” has to be very bad news, amiright? And when you combine it with “crotch”, you’ve got every pregnant woman’s worst nightmare. But that’s just the tip of the iceberg of pregnancy aches and pains. From sore backs to aching bellies, it’s a damn good thing there’s BLANQI…
Lightning crotch. It’s a thing, I swear. If you don’t believe me, Google it.
It’s that stabbing pain in the vagina – like a bolt of lightning going through your cervix – that happens suddenly and unexpectedly during pregnancy, particularly in your third trimester. Caused by the weight of the baby on the nerves in your pelvic area – and made worse when your little angel has “dropped” lower into your pelvis in preparation for the birth – lightning crotch is the female equivalent of being kicked in the nuts. Nice.
As my friend Jen likes to put it, “It felt like Oliver was stabbing me in the vajayjay with a chopstick.” Hmmmm… moving right along.
When you’re pregnant, there are days when you’d be hard-pressed to find a square inch on your body that isn’t aching. Your lower back feels like it’s on fire, your tender feet have swollen to the size of soccer balls and can no longer be squeezed into your dainty shoes, your belly is all kinds of ouch (stupid round ligaments, whatever they are), and your brain feels like it’s been sautéed on a hot plate. And your doc says all you can have is Tylenol?! AW, HELL.
Next thing you know, you’re a sobbing mess because you just can’t do this anyyymooooorrre. But you have to because it’s your BABY for crying out loud, and it’s not fully cooked yet, so you have to keep trucking on. The emotional toll is MONUMENTAL, but you have to grin and bear it lest people assume you’re an ungrateful, cranky-ass mom-to-be.
Girl, I cannot begin to tell you how deeply I feel your pain. I did pregnancy twice (the second time being with twins – ouch squared) and I just don’t think I’d do it again. But that’s because I didn’t know about the *miracle* that is BLANQI. I just put up with the pain like a bumbling fool. If only I’d known there were some beautifully designed, high-tech products out there to ease all my aches and pains, pregnancy would’ve been a whole different ballgame.
Sure, I had a crappy bellyband that I bought at a retail chain, but it stretched out after two washes. Not that it gave me any support in the first place. It looked and felt like one of those ‘80s headbands I used to rock in elementary school. NOT HELPING.
BLANQI’S Maternity Built-in Support Bellyband on the other hand? A gift from the gods. Hello, seamless panels of varying compression that lift, support and secure your bump from every angle. You’ll literally breathe a sigh of relief as you slip the butter-soft fabric over your belly and instantly feel lower-back and pelvic pain melt away. Plus, the longline hem secures those jeans and skirts you can no longer button up, and it looks great layered under your favorite tops. For $38 a pop, you’d be cray not to get one (or two or three).
Want the same belly and back support as the bellyband, but with a nice little bust boost too? Meet your new best friend, the Maternity Underbust Belly Support Tank. Not only will the cutting-edge technical construction relieve your aches, but the underbust design will allow you to layer the tank over your favorite maternity bra or crop top and throw your favorite T-shirt on top for a smooth, sexy-mama silhouette.
Or maybe you don’t want to mess around with layers. Maybe you just want one item of clothing that you can throw on before walking out the door. A supportive, comfortable, pain-relieving, fabulous-looking item. Is that too much to ask? No way! The Maternity Belly Support Tanktop is all that and more. You might want to snap up both colors right away because otherwise you’ll be hand-washing that one precious tank every night (trust me).
Goodbye, backache. See ya, pelvic pain. Sayonara, lightning crotch (hopefully). BLANQI’S got your back (and belly).